These past few weeks we’ve looked at how easy it is for our sense of value to nose-dive when something unexpected happens and we lose our sense of security.

Moving into December… with holidays coming up, times that can bring up stress and tension… if you’ve been feeling not good enough for any reason, here’s what you can do.

First thing is ..accept how things are and be realistic. We talked about letting go of expectations. If you recognise that you want to make sure that everyone comes together and is happy, you feel responsible for making sure that everything is perfect, this is a sneaky way that feeling less plays out. You don’t need everyone’s approval, just your own. So, one solution is to let go of who you think you should be, who you believe others expect you to be, and let go of having to do it all.

Ask what your heart wants, from that set an intent of how you want to be …perhaps relaxed…and then make a plan as to how it can happen.

You can ask others to help, perhaps ask everyone to pitch in and bring a plate, wash the dishes. Its more fun that way because everyone participates. You can give yourself a break, you don’t have to be perfect; you can allow things to unfold. Let your imagination run with doing things differently…find your magic!

You can’t control how others behave…you can control how you are with others. So, let your intent be your internal anchor – about how you want to be and let go of everything else. This was something I did when my marriage ended, when it was challenging to face holidays alone.

Out of tension, its amazing what can be enjoyed! Be present to the good in your life.